I have been going through a very rough spiritual upheaval lately and for the longest time I have felt that deadening my desire or expectations of things would help me move on from a lot of the pains I’ve gone through. It wasn’t until my good friend Sandra posted this that I started to rethink the way I lived.
“If we can convince ourselves that we don’t want, we won’t hurt… when we deaden ourselves to desire, a lot that’s good and right and true in us dies in the process. The insidious part about deadening desire is that in some circles it brings applause. We call a passionless person by other names. We say she is a stable, responsible soul. Those who have given up all claim to desire are sometimes called godly… some feel the only way they can serve God is to keep all their desires at the lowest possible level. But God does not deaden desire – rather he awakens and transforms it.”
- Paula Rinehart
Now, I am by no means a religious person, but I’d like to think that I am a spiritual one. Lately I’m beginning to understand that being devoid for desire is not the same thing as dealing with my pain, anger, or expectations. Deadening desire does not reconcile with others and it does not inspire me to be a better person.
On a more “catching up with life” note- I’ve been working a lot out of monetary necessity lately. It feels good to go back to do something for me and I’ve been getting this vibe that perhaps I should sharpen my pencil work further and make a thing out of it instead of focusing on other media too much. I’m working on this new piece which is as much as a struggle for me as my little wrangler boy keeping on his seat.
Thank you for listening in everyone. It means so much that you guys keep interest. I hope to close the 150 mark on my Facebook Page and I hope to do something special soon to commemorate the occasion.